The UK Porn Laws

This is a poem I shared on FaceBook yesterday.  I figured I should post it on my blog for posterity.  

I support the legislation
That’s killing British porn
‘Cos when it comes to masturbation
Brit-Porn makes me yawn

If I want to see good spanking
I’ll download some German MILFs
To support a good night’s yanking
They’re the master race of filth

If I want to see obscenities
And the worst humiliation
I’ll turn to Eastern Europeans
And their urolagniation

America, the beautiful
Is first for girl-on-girl
Unless they’re drinking from one cup
In which case I might hurl.

But I support this legislation
We’ve all wanted these rules madly
Perhaps they’ll stop this Tory government
From fucking us so badly.